“Someone else’s opinion if you is none of your business”. – Rachel Hollis
Wow. I can’t begin to tell you how much that quote that resonated with me, but I’m going to try.
It’s no secret that I have social anxiety. I think that must seem really strange considering how open I am online, but it’s true. In real life, I feel awkward. I get nervous and I stumble over my words. Here, though? This is my comfort zone. My soft place to land. While I sometimes regret how much I choose to share, written words come so much more easily for me than face to face conversations. I can put more thought into what I’m saying. I can hit backspace. I can erase the messy bits.
Part of my social anxiety stems from my insecurities about what people think of me. Their opinion of me- all of me. Are they noticing my messy eyebrows, my bitten fingernails, the gaps in my teeth? Are they judging my clothing or the way I laugh, too loud, too boisterous? “Someone else’s opinion of you, is none of your business”. How freeing is that?
You see, the truth is, there are people out there who don’t like me, and there are people out there who love me to bits. Guess which ones I focus on when I’m feeling insecure and I’m second guessing myself? And I know I’m not alone.
I follow Emmy Rosssum on Instagram. Tiny, perfect, Emmy Rossum. Today her IG story was about how she sometimes googles “what does (insert celebrity) weigh, and how the comments make her stress about her weight, stress about her body. Then she posted a pic of herself with some of her positive qualities written on it, with the implication that those attributes make up who she is, she’s more than a number on the scale. Other people’s opinions about her bring out her insecurities.
There is freedom in not even allowing yourself to consider what other people think because what they think has no bearing on who you are.
I’m a mother. A proud mother. My kids fill me with so much pride. Yesterday I was stalking my 17 year old’s twitter and I saw a post she made where she said, “this is why my mom is my best friend.” No one’s opinion matters more than those of my babies. Why have I wasted my time worrying?
I’m a lover. Of animals, nature, the great outdoors. I’m compassionate. I have a big heart. I am a Christian. One who tries to love and live like Christ did. I may not always be successful, but when I’m not, my opinion of myself weighs far more than someone else’s opinion of me.
I’m a work in progress, just like you.